I don’t rent cars.

This was Sandra’s brother’s awesome Jeep. Since Sandra is super sophisticated, and has always lived in cities, she does not have a driver’s license.

So I got to drive us around. Cruising up and down the street of Detroit in a massive black Jeep, turns out, is very very good for your ego.

SEE ALSO: I Saw Dave Fucking Chappelle At The Fillmore 

I’m a pretty good driver, considering all of my time living in Philadelphia. But as with all things, I am also a little extra. I was unfazed driving down the highway, blurting out bits of undeserved road rage upon other drivers, as Sandra gingerly took my phone out of my hand and said something like –

“Yeah, I’m just gonna put this over here.”